Personal Development (Part 1) The Modern Ache

Why You Aren’t as Happy, Successful and Fulfilled as You Should Be

Before we look at improving your life and achieving that sense of accomplishment and fulfilment, it first makes sense to focus on the things we’re doing wrong. The things that we could be doing better and the things that are holding us back.

Why don’t you feel fulfilled? Why don’t you have more time to take care of your looks or your home? Why is your relationship falling apart?
How did you end up in a dead-end job?

Let’s take a look at a story that many of us will be familiar with: the story of the modern man.

The Plight of the Modern Person

Most of us were very happy when we were younger. We were excited to be learning and discovering so much and we were taken care of all the while by our doting parents. Every day was an adventure, everything was new and we were constantly growing and developing.
Back then, you probably had big dreams. You probably knew what you wanted to be: whether that was an astronaut, a rock star or an actor.

Then you probably got a little more serious around high school when you would have realized that you needed to be more serious with the kind of work you did. You probably discovered a subject that you enjoyed and decided that you would pursue that into college. Hence you might have taken up math, science or drama.At college you met new people, discovered that the world was much larger and came away feeling on top of the world. With diploma in hand, you were ready to take on the world.

Only you discovered you had no experience and as such, employers were not exactly queuing up to give you a job. Meanwhile, you needed a roof over your head and wanted to move out of your Mum and Dad’s place, so you decided to take any work you could get.
You might have a degree in science or literature, but now you’re working in an estate agent’s or a logistics company. You’re stuffing envelopes or dealing with requests and it’s not particularly fun. But hey, you’re earning money and you’re out there!And then you meet someone who you fall in love with.

You’re happy together – after all, you’re both young and attractive – so you start renting a place.Only now you’re juggling work, a relationship and rent. That leaves less time for seeing friends and less time for staying in shape or pursuing your dreams.And it’s a little small, isn’t it? So, you decide that you need to move into a bigger place. It’s time you got on the property ladder! And that means saving. So, you unfortunately don’t have the luxury to look for other work – you need to take the next position that’s offered in your organization.And that increases the stress.

Now you’re coming home a little later and a little more stressed and you have less energy and less time to spend with your partner. But you’re both working toward the same dream, so you get married and buy a house and it all seems great.Only now your responsibilities are much bigger. Now you’re working until 6, 7 or 8pm on a regular basis and you can’t see an easy way out. Then the boiler breaks and the fence blows down and you’re blowing more of your savings on making those repairs.

There’s no way at this point that you can consider leaving your job and in the evenings, all you want to do is to crash on the couch and recover from the stressful day you just had. Later a baby will come along and you’ll live to look after them.These are all great things: having a partner, a baby and a home are fantastic achievements that bring contentment. But you can’t live for those things. You need to look after yourself as well and you need to chase your dreams.

Otherwise, you’ll become a burned out, tired husk of a person with no ambition, no drive and no enthusiasm. That’s no kind of impression to make and especially if you start to resent your family.

You never travelled.
You never pursued your dream job.
You don’t go out with friends any more.
You’ve gained weight.
You look a mess.
Your house is untidy…

And you have no energy to do anything about it and no way of knowing how to go about it.

Is it any wonder that so many people are depressed?

Is it any wonder that so many marriages end in divorce?Depressing? Sure. And especially if you can recognize some truth in it.